Blue Christmas

While Christmas is a time of joy, peace, and celebration, those experiencing grief find it can be a difficult and lonely time of year. The Blue Christmas service is designed for those who are struggling with a loss during the holiday season.

Rick Glowacki, former lead pastor at Columbus Assembly of God in Columbus, Indiana, and the church congregation participated in a community Blue Christmas service before he retired from his role. It was sponsored by a local ecumenical ministry, Love Chapel, and was a cooperative event with several other local churches. 

According to Glowacki, “That grief journey is difficult, and when you have lost someone in that holiday season, in the time between Thanksgiving through around the first of the year, sometimes those people are hit the hardest.”

He described the tone of the event as more subdued than the typical joyful, upbeat tempo of a Christmas service, with readings from Psalms and even Lamentations.

“We still recognized, of course, the birth of Christ and even focused on the fact that those whom we have lost who knew Jesus we would see again. But there was still the sense that this is a different year or a different season. At a Blue Christmas service, certainly there was music, and some of it was traditional Christmas music. It was just done in a way of recognizing that everybody there had their own loss.”

While many attendees had recently suffered the loss of a parent, spouse, or child, others had experienced loss many years prior and still found the service meaningful. In addition, Glowacki stated that grief can come in many forms.

“The other thing that we would recognize was not just death, but sometimes it might have been divorce, it could be estrangement. We wanted people to realize as much as we possibly could that Jesus was with them, even in this joyful season, possibly in a different way. And here was a group of people that you can celebrate Christmas with in a much more subdued way.”

Glowacki, who mourned the loss of his own mother, shared about a moment in a Blue Christmas service that particularly impacted him.

“I don't know that there was any particular circumstance for me personally that year, but with the passage of Scripture I was given to read as well as my own personal reflection, both on the Scripture and on loss, I found my heart strongly moved to the point that my voice cracked and a tear came to my eye. I think I could sense people relating both to me and to the presence of God. It was a very special moment. What it did is it almost tied a bow around the fact that this is why we do this.”

“The service has many different readers of passages, and while it was unplanned, we all related to a loss we had personally gone through” says Kelly Daugherty, Director of Love Chapel. “It was totally unscripted, but perfectly appropriate and seemed to add a lot to the service.”

Glowacki also spoke about the importance of sharing about the Blue Christmas services to others in the church.

“Because of the busyness of our lives, unless we're directly connected to somebody who's walking through grief, it becomes very easy to forget about them” Glowacki says. “There are those who may spend the holiday alone because of their family situation, or they're estranged, or their children live a distance away. I think just speaking about it can remind people that there are others that are walking through grief.”

Blue Christmas services are increasing in number across the country as awareness grows and churches look to find additional ways to support those in their congregations and communities.

Ash Grove Assembly of God recently hosted its first Blue Christmas service. Senior pastor Tim Pipkin realized that there were many who found the Christmas season difficult and wanted to minister to them. 

“This service provided people a way to remember lost loved ones as well as an opportunity to acknowledge Christmas when they didn’t feel like having a celebration” Pipkin says.

He centered his message around the story of Lazarus.

“Even though Jesus knows the hope of what’s coming with the resurrection of Lazarus, he pauses in the moment of their grief and shares it with them. Jesus doesn’t avoid that place of grief and sorrow. He wants to be with us in the pain” Pipkin shared.

Both Glowacki and Pipkin shared that while attendance may have been less than expected, it did not detract from the meaningful impact of the service on those present.

“Although the Blue Christmas attendance from my congregation wasn't as large as I was hoping, there was a sense of being a part of it and talking about it that helped people to realize that others were going through a rough time this year” Glowacki says.

Pipkin says that he would encourage other churches to host a Blue Christmas service as it is a powerful opportunity to minister to the community.

“It’s not always about the number of people you attract. It’s about who you’re able to minister to.”